A look into why these 7 traits might make someone difficult
The seven traits highlighted in the unmanageable person test may make person, well, difficult because the traits come in direct enemy to what makes a kinship goodly, says license clinical psychologist Ramani Durvasula, PhD. “ On the simplest level, all of them are traits that are probable to put a person at odds with other people, ” she says. “ These are not behaviors that result in what we consider to be the core of a healthy relationship : deference, forgivingness, compassion, reciprocality, [ and ] mutuality. ” Because these traits can be harmful to relationships, taking the difficult person test to figure out where you land on each can help you be more mindful of your behavior—which, in twist, might promote healthier relationships. Dr. Durvasula caveats that no matter your test results, you should neither feel sad or proud, because it reflects but a modest partially of you either way. Plus, no one is going to score zero on the test, because no one ’ s perfect. And with the help of some introspection, your results can highlight to you where in your life you might have room for improvement.
“ At some floor, knowing where you fall on that scale might actually show you some vulnerabilities. ” —psychologist Ramani Durvasula, PhD
“ At some floor, knowing where you fall on that scale might actually show you some vulnerabilities, ” says Dr. Durvasula. “ For example, you know that there might be hotheadedness, stubbornness, or rigidity… If you learn about that and actually are volition to be vulnerable and self-reflective, you can be more careful [ of that ]. ”
The 7 key traits measured by the difficult person test
Dr. Durvasula says unfeelingness, which is characterized by a miss of empathy, can make person unmanageable because empathy is a core requirement for goodly relationships. Highly callous people “ have no interest in the experiences of others, ” she adds. “ They ‘re dismissive of the emotional experiences, the pain, or the harms other people are going through. They do not create a dependable distance for early people. ” Without empathy, Dr. Durvasula says, it ’ mho unvoiced to establish a healthy relationship, because you lose the ability to create a association based on vulnerability.
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When person scores gamey in grandiosity on the Difficult Person Test, it may reflect a impression that they believe they ‘re superscript to others. While a grandiose person can be very alluring because they have big dreams, they can besides be exhausting to be around. “ grandiose people tend to suck the oxygen out of the board and hog all the attention, ” says Dr. Durvasula. “ They think everything should be about them. ” They may be out of reach with reality, which stifles their interpersonal relationships, Dr. Durvasula adds.
person high in aggressiveness tends to be hostile and ill-bred toward others, which doesn ’ t precisely lend itself to being an easy-to-get-along-with person—especially considering that these folks may walk into a board ready for a verbal affray. “ Everything ‘s a contend. They ‘ve always got their fists up, so there ‘s no warmth with them, ” says Dr. Durvasula. “ You walk in, and it feels already like you ‘re headed for a fight, so it ‘s about impossible to create healthy sociable linkages. ” Being aggressive toward others means that people interact with you from a home of fear rather of a place of collaboration—and, to be sure, that ‘s not a good place to be.
not to say that you shouldn ’ t be wary of people if they ’ ra displaying signs they ’ rhenium untrustworthy, but being unreasonably fishy international relations and security network ’ thymine ideal for getting along with people, either. ampere far as the Difficult Person Test goes, a high grade in misgiving reflects person having trouble oneself trust, which is foundational to relationships. “ [ Highly fishy folks ] merely truly think the worst of people—they ‘re leery of everybody, ” says Dr. Durvasula. “ It ‘s very unmanageable for them to establish faith. They constantly think person ‘s working an slant. ” leery people may believe that no one has their rear, that everyone has later motives, or that everyone is out to get them. When you meet person like this, particularly if you haven ’ t done anything to warrant the misgiving, it might signal that you ‘ll have street fighter time getting along.
Put plainly, people who score high on manipulativeness practice different forms of exploitative behavior to get what they want ( as opposed to good asking for help. ) This is debatable because it normally means merely the person who ’ south manipulate is getting their needs met, says Dr. Durvasula : “ Because they ‘re exploitative, they ‘re constantly taking advantage of other people, getting what they want, and getting what they need, which means that other people are probably not getting what they want. ”
similar to aggressiveness, dominance in relationships operates based on fear, says Dr. Durvasula. “ In a dominant relationship, there ‘s no equity. There ‘s no share. It ‘s not about connection, ” she says. “ It ‘s about regnant by fear and another person feeling controlled, and it ‘s not adept for a person in a relationship. This is not a healthy kinship moral force. ”
Scoring high on risk-taking may mean more than having a strong sense of venture. rather, it may reflect a person who looks for ways to experience thrills through hazardous behavior or dangerous activities. “ Risk-taking falls into something we call impulsivity or disinhibition, so it ‘s getting this get up out of doing things that are dangerous, ” Dr. Durvasula says. “ They can ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate feel things unless they ’ re over the top. ” This causes difficulties getting along with others because bad activities aren ’ thymine mean to connect with others, but meant to make you feel something. additionally, risk-takers tend to get bored easily, which can push them to pressure the people around them to keep pushing the envelope so that the risk-taker can get a rush.
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